After a long night of being at the bars, my friends and I went to one last bar. In my drunken stupor I didn’t realize that the doorman was actually a police officer. He asked for my zip code and I said, “I have no idea.” He said, “You can’t remember your zip code?” I responded with “I’m drunk!” He let me in.
The best time for a burger:
My best friend had left her ID at home, so she attempted to use a burger to get into the bar. She then sat in the middle of the road and refused to get up. Alcohol may have been involved.
The fall of Steve:
When I was 19, I got an ID from the DMV with a friend’s birth certificate. Despite the fact that I was 19, I looked 14. I was using it at a local liquor store and the clerk didn’t believe I was 21. In walked a cop. He showed the ID to the cop, who said it was legit. The clerk apologized and rung me up.
The name on the ID was David. As I left the store, my neighbor came in and said, “Hi Steve! How’s your mom?”
The cop stopped in his tracks. I was caught. I got my ID taken. I got a ticket for having a “real” fake ID. Had MY license suspended for a year. And…of course my neighbor told my mom about the whole thing.
Attention to details:
My roommate got into a bar using my fake ID right after I did. She’s black, and both me and my ID are white. Surprisingly a 23-year-old guy got stopped after her for his ID.
Heartbreak and IDs:
When I was underage I used an ID that was real and belonged to an older girl who was a friend of a friend (she just claimed she “lost” hers and got an extra from the DMV that I paid her for). It worked great for months if not years, until I tried to get into a club and the bouncer took one look at it, shook his head, and said, “This is my ex, and you aren’t her. Sorry!”
Felonies in Mexico:
One time while in Mexico I was drinking in public with a couple of friends and we got arrested by the local police. I was 17 at the time and carrying one of my friends’ ID, so while we were being processed I used my friend’s ID. My friend that wasn’t even there with us now has a felony in another country.
A friend found it and gave it to me because the picture on it and I actually looked a bit similar. It was obviously someone else’s fake, as the address was “Mimosa Lane” in — no joke — “Dalals.” They couldn’t even spell Dallas right!
In my freshman year of college, there was a foreign exchange student from Belgium. He was 22 and I was only 18. We looked so much alike that when we went out to bars he would go in first and I would be right behind him. I would pretend that I forgot my wallet and ID and say, “I’m so sorry but I forgot my wallet. This is my twin, is there any chance that you can let me in?” It worked every single time.
It’s not my fault!
I went to a bar with my old roommate’s ID. I am about 110 pounds, and on her ID it says 210 pounds. The bouncer took me aside and started asking me questions about my address, name, etc., and he made me sign my name on a sheet of paper. Luckily, I signed it exactly like her ID. I started crying and told him, “Maybe I should just go get another ID, since this happens to me everywhere I go. It’s not my fault I’ve lost weight!”
—Amanda Jane Sybrant, Facebook
Brand spankin’ new fakes:
In the first week of the second semester of my freshman year of college, I was having lunch with a friend. He looked at me with excitement and said, “You have to see my new fake.” I smiled and agreed, until he actually pulled it out.
“Um…this guy is Indian…”
“Yeah, what’s your point?”
“Well, you’re black.”
Not sure if it actually ever worked for him.
In college once I gave my fake to a bouncer and all he said was “You really paid money for this?” and then proceeded to let me into the bar.
Humor is the best weapon:
We used to have this one ID that we passed back to literally everyone. It didn’t look like any of us, but it worked at the more lax dives when I was in school. I’m Asian and the ID was of an Asian guy. When I started going out, it was with my friends from an Asian student group, so we usually never had to worry. Anyways, I was out with a friend who was (and looked) very Irish. Lighter skin than me, red hair, etc. He didn’t have an ID, and I wound up passing the ID back to him. The bouncer laughed for a good 30 seconds, told us we made his night, and let him in.
Went to a bar where they had a scanner to tell if the licensed person was old enough to drink. My fake ID didn’t even have a barcode.
I actually got accused multiple times of having a fake ID, but it was legitimately always a real one from the DMV. One time I presented my ID to the door lady checking ID and after inspecting my photo and “bendability” of my card for two full minutes she looked up at me slowly and said, “Sweetie, no, this isn’t you. Do you think I’m stupid?” I offered to show her SIX alternate forms of identification in my wallet, including my nursing license, all with correctly matching info. She then demanded to have my phone so she could call my parents and tell them I was trying to sneak into a bar. I was so annoyed at that point I just yelled, “CALL THEM THEN!! I’M TWENTY-FUCKING-SIX YEARS OLD!!”
Pros and cons:
My friend had a fake ID at 15 and was on the train as the inspector came along. She showed her ticket everything was fine until he spotted her fake driving license. He assumed it was real and she got fined for traveling on a child’s pass as an adult.
My cousin was visiting from out of town and wanted to go out. She’s underage, but had just borrowed a friend’s ID for her trip. Before we got to the bar I quizzed her on the ID (birthday, eye color, etc.) just in case. When we got to the bar, the bouncer looked her up and down, clearly already aware it wasn’t her ID. He asked for a second piece — she didn’t have one. He continued to ask questions like “What’s your full name?” She said a completely different name than that on the card. He then asked her to spell her last name, to which she replied, “I don’t know how to spell my last name.” The guy just shook his head at us and waved us in.
I handed my fake ID to the waitress at the first restaurant we went to without hesitation. The waitress looked at the ID and said to me, “Oh, you’re from Jersey? So am I!” I freaked out and just looked at her and said, “Okay.” She didn’t give me a hard time because the embarrassment was enough.
And love in the time of fake IDs:
It’s not my story, but my mom’s. She had an older sister who moved to Arizona and didn’t need her California driver’s license. My mom, knowing her sister’s drivers license number and Social Security and such, went in and said she needed a new license and picture, and she looked enough like her sister that they took a new picture and gave her one. When she met my dad he thought she was 21 because she got drinks and could get into clubs and such, but she was really 18. He thought she was only six years younger than him and didn’t find that out he was nine years older until her birthday.